Wait, Women Actually Want Sex?

I recently discovered MH. At first, I thought I stumbled into pornography. The erotic stories have explicit (vulgar) descriptive nouns and verbs, and the activities described seem like they are pure sexual fantasy because nobody ever really has sex the way it’s described here. Or do you?

When I was a teenager I was so naïve, I never imagined that any of my peers were actually having sex. As I started dating in college, I was a bit of a shy nebbish who sent out vibes that are the exact opposite of what would attract women. I was the opposite of confident. I don’t mean to say I’m unattractive but my only relationships were with women who weren’t exactly comfortable with their bodies. That’s the only type of woman I could feel comfortable with, because women who look like the photos on the MH website would be waaaaay out of my league.

I began to believe that women really don’t want to have sex. If they do, it’s a favor, or they feel guilty of depriving you. It never occurred to me that women actually wanted sex. Pornography was the only place—a purely fictional one—that appeared to show women who actually craved sex. That did psychological damage to me, which I still carry over three decades later and after two decades of marriage.

My wife has also managed to shy away from sex over the past twenty years. Our marriage easily qualifies as a “sexless” marriage. So it has been a self-reinforcing belief that women simply have no interest in sex, and if they do, then there is probably something wrong with them. Very sad, I know. I suspect more than a few women reading this will assure me that sex is absolutely something they crave and desire on a very regular basis. (LLL in particular piques my interest woman whose existence seems impossible in some ways.)

I’ve come to realize an important concept that single men should be aware of. How can you know if a woman will be an exciting sexual partner in marriage? Pay attention to every clue she gives about how she feels about HERSELF. If she feels good about herself, if she thinks she’s sexy and she’s comfortable with herself and her body, then you have a powerful clue that you will have a fulfilling sexual marriage. Because when you find a woman who feels comfortable with her body and is comfortable exploring her entire physical body (eg: LLL), then you should feel safe in looking forward to an active and healthy sex life after the wedding.

I have zero intention of divorcing my wife due to a sexless marriage. Ultimately, she and I are probably a perfect pair, because I am willing to stay married wereas perhaps a healthy sexual male would divorce her or cheat. I just feel sad and angry sometimes when I read stories like yours and sincerely ask myself: Do y’all really do the things you describe in your stories, or are they complete fiction or extreme exaggeration intended to provide sexual arousal? Please let me know. G-d bless you all.