In my varied reading, I came across two sources that both stated something interesting. Now, neither of these sources were Christian, but if the data was true, then I think it holds something quite hopeful for women.
You all may remember that I asked for your thoughts way back in one of my early posts about orgasming from penetrative sex. From what I’d read as far as statistics go, it seemed that most women can’t orgasm from PIV sex alone and need some other stimulation, usually clitoral. But so many stories, both on Marriage Heat and other forums, especially romance novels, cast women as thrashing with pleasure just from being pounded. Add to that seeming contradiction the experience I’ve had in my journey of self-exploration, in which I’m sensing more and more a magnitudinous pleasure just from using my dildo.
(I’ll throw in a quick spicy scene here about one of the last times I masturbated.
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I was on my knees, leaning back on my palms, and slowly sliding up and down the slippery cock. Oh my goodness, it felt SO incredible! The head was rubbing against this spot along the front wall of my pussy—I assume the G-spot—and I rode that thing luxuriously for a little while without even touching my clit. I thought I might even orgasm just from that. After a bit, the sensation wasn’t as strong and I moved to lying on my back. I resumed pumping myself hard with the dildo and started rubbing my clit furiously. That almost always guarantees a convulsive orgasm. My inner muscles clench so hard I feel like I’ll squirt. From the wetness leaking out of me afterwards, maybe I do to some degree. I had one of those amazing orgasms, and after cumming I just lay there, breathing deeply and smiling to myself, imagining that the juice oozing out of me was my future husband’s cum.
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Whew, I think I need some self-care after I finish writing . . .
Anyhow, the question about this had returned to my ever-inquisitive-about-sex brain, and then I read these two articles.
The first was a newsletter from one of the online sex toy stores I had visited before. (Now, of course, they’re filling my inbox with ads and deals for toys I can’t afford, lol.) The topic was the orgasm gap between men and women and the reasons for it. According to some stats the showed, many women in heterosexual relationships don’t orgasm as often as men; some rarely or never do; however, women in lesbian relationships orgasm way more, close to the percentage men do. Huh!
So their claim was that it’s not that women can’t orgasm at a frequency similar to men, but that many men don’t give them a chance to orgasm. (The article was a little bit feminist in this respect, blaming men and “the patriarchy” for not learning about women’s bodies, but they ended on a positive note, encouraging couples to learn about each other and explore more.)
The capability is there. But because of a long history of society not really understanding women’s sexuality (I will have to say that I think that’s true), your average guy doesn’t really know how to turn a woman on and make sex, including penetration, enjoyable. I of course will make an exception for the gentlemen here on MH; you all sound like wonderful husbands or husbands-in-preparation who want to “live with your wives with understanding” (1 Peter 3:7). That means so much to us ladies. As a side note, I’m doing all I can now to practice that mindset myself, so I have as much knowledge and info about men as possible for if I ever become a wife. It does go both ways!
Article Number 2 was actually not an article; it was a Reddit thread by and for men who practice the “bull” lifestyle.
[Editor’s note for readers: In this context, a “bull” lifestyle refers to a man who has sex with a married or otherwise partnered woman with consent from her and her partner.]
(Yeah, Reddit has a lot of crazy rabbit holes and I stumble over some interesting stuff). Not that I condone that at all, though it makes for hot fantasies. But it was very eye-opening to read the discussions or Q&As. I must admit, most of the men on there were respectful guys with boundaries and ethics (well, as much as they could be while entering the marriage bed of various couples and having sex with the wife).
Anyhow, there was a question about how often women orgasmed from PIV sex only, and several of the bulls said that EVERY TIME they had sex with some hotwife, she orgasmed. They stressed things like taking their time, getting the woman wet, using fingers and mouth first, and then locating the G-spot. They even remarked that some of the wives had never orgasmed before, and called out the husbands for being losers and not pleasuring their wives. It was quite fascinating.
Again, I’m not promoting this lifestyle or suggesting that unsatisfied wives go find a bull. Rather, I’m hoping that this will help husbands BE the bull! Because again, the ability to orgasm is there, hiding in every woman.
I was really encouraged by this information because I used to worry about not being able to orgasm from PIV sex if I ever get married. The more I experiment with the dildo, the more I think I can. At least, I feel closer to it. It is actually enjoyable to have something penetrate me, and a few times recently, it’s been really awesome.
Ladies, we are fearfully and wonderfully made. It’s just taken science and medicine and society a while to discover some of the sexual aspects! I hope this was an encouraging read.
The post Maybe We’ve Been Wrong – Female PIV Pleasure appeared first on Married sex stories – erotica – marriage sex blogs.
